Once there was a duck, a moose and a skunk. One day, they went to a restaurant. When they went to pay for the food the moose did not have a buck and the skunk did not have a cent. So....they all put it on the duck's bill.

A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night. When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the ducks bill.

Two sausages were sizzling in a pan, one sausage turns to the other and says, "it's hot in here!" The other sausage replies, "Hey a talking sausage!"

Three people are driving in the desert. Their car breaks down. The smart man says "I want the body of the car for its shade," the medium smart man says "I want the blankets for a tent" and the dumb man says "I want the door". The other two exchanged looks. "Why do you want the door?" they asked. Then he replied, "when I'm hot I can stick my head out the window and feel the breeze!"

One day, the president was on a plane with his wife and a pilot, but it was take your daughter to work day so the pilot had his daughter with him. The daughter had a backpack with her and there were 3 parachutes. Then all of a sudden, the plane was going to crash any second because of an engine problem. The president said, "I'm the most important person in the world, so I get to jump out first!" So he jumped out with a parachute. Then the president's wife said, "I'm married to the most important person in the world so I get to jump out!" So she did. Then the pilot said, "honey, you jump out first because there's only one parachute left." "no daddy, there's still two left!" "no there's only one left." " no daddy.... the lady took my backpack!!!!!!"

There was a man in prison he tried to find a way out, but he couldn't. Finally, he found a way out through the cellar. So, he went through the cellar and ended up in a park. He shouted "I'm free! I'm free!" and a little girl said, "neat I'm 4."

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