Once there was a duck, a moose and a
skunk. One day, they went to a restaurant. When they went to pay for the
food the moose did not have a buck and the skunk did not have a cent.
So....they all put it on the duck's bill.
A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for
dinner at a restaurant one night. When it came time to pay, the skunk
didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on
the ducks bill.
Two sausages were sizzling in a pan, one
sausage turns to the other and says, "it's hot in here!" The
other sausage replies, "Hey a talking sausage!"
Three people are driving in the desert.
Their car breaks down. The smart man says "I want the body of the
car for its shade," the medium smart man says "I want the
blankets for a tent" and the dumb man says "I want the door".
The other two exchanged looks. "Why do you want the door?"
they asked. Then he replied, "when I'm hot I can stick my head out
the window and feel the breeze!"
One day, the president was on a plane with
his wife and a pilot, but it was take your daughter to work day so the
pilot had his daughter with him. The daughter had a backpack with her
and there were 3 parachutes. Then all of a sudden, the plane was going
to crash any second because of an engine problem. The president said,
"I'm the most important person in the world, so I get to jump out
first!" So he jumped out with a parachute. Then the president's
wife said, "I'm married to the most important person in the world
so I get to jump out!" So she did. Then the pilot said, "honey,
you jump out first because there's only one parachute left." "no
daddy, there's still two left!" "no there's only one left."
" no daddy.... the lady took my backpack!!!!!!"
There was a man in prison he tried to find
a way out, but he couldn't. Finally, he found a way out through the
cellar. So, he went through the cellar and ended up in a park. He
shouted "I'm free! I'm free!" and a little girl said, "neat