Comment on nosiness - 2003

Originally published http://www.spot.no/32850.html

Duvet-peaking – A new national sport?

We want to know all there is to know about celebrities. What they do, why they do it and who they’re doing it with. Most of all we’d love to be a fly on the wall while things happened under the duvet – preferably many enough to be able to lift up and look underneath.

 

Who’s Wondering – We, Or The Press?

Lately I’ve noticed how important it is for us to know what celebrities do in their own time. If we didn’t want to read about it, magazines/papers wouldn’t write about it. Is Bruce Willis back with Demi More? Is Janet Jackson in a relationship with Justin Timberlake? Who’s Robbie Williams dating again? Is Geri Halliwell getting married?

These are all questions we ask ourselves after we’ve read a small teaser in for instance Hello or OK magazine. Then we wonder, “Huh, maybe Gwyneth really is a cover and Norwegian Eva is together with the Spanish Prince again...?” The truth is that first of all we really don’t have any right to know what these people do in their own time, and second of all we wouldn’t even know about these things if the press hadn’t followed these people around day and night to dig up something intriguing to feed us with. Most people have the I don’t really care and it doesn’t really interest me, but since we’re skipping through it and it’s there... attitude.

I guess we’ve all wondered about one thing or another regarding a celebrity, but the question is whether we had wondered about it if we hadn’t heard it somewhere first. Had anyone wondered whether or not Ricky Martin was gay or not if the press hadn’t asked the question first? Would the relationship between Ally McBeal and Indiana Jones interest anyone if the press hadn’t been on their backs all the time, following their every move? Maybe we wonder what our neighbour does every once in a while, but do we go over there, ring the doorbell and ask Hey you! Who’s that chap you’re shagging? Have you been seeing him long? You see, I was just wondering, and most likely I’m not the only one, so what I’ll do is I’ll write a memo from this conversation, add a couple of juicy details and print one copy for each household...?


If He... Is He Then...

For a while there was a lot of focus on the fact that Robert Downey Jr is what would be regarded as a junkie, and not on his ability as an actor. OK, so he has a problem. To my knowledge he’s not the only person in the world who has problems with those things, and to be rather bloody honest it interests me right up the arse what he does when he’s not doing a movie. Every other week it was “Downey Jr back on drugs”, “Downey Jr arrested” and “Downey Jr drug free and healthy”. What he does privately should have nothing to do with how his latest picture is reviewed, unless he does a lousy job on it. Whether or not it has anything to do with his actual problem.

Some have problems with the fact that Elton John is gay. Seriously, unless he shags his boyfriend David on stage in front of a crowd, I can’t say I see the real problem. You don’t need all the gory details about what’s going on behind closed doors, and even though it’s only a small number of people who are actually interested in knowing anything whatsoever about just that, the tabloid press ask the questions anyway. It’s between the lines. “Elton John and David Furnish having a romantic dinner together in St. Tropez” with room for interpretations such as “and guess what’s going on after the romantic dinner in France, just the two of’em, alone, in the bedroom...”


Interesting Questions

Is Bruce Willis a better or worse actor if he’s dating Demi More or not? Is Robbie Williams a better or worse singer if he’s single or in a relationship? Is Geri Halliwell getting more or less talented if she got married? Is Elton John’s music better or worse because he goes to bed with a man every night? Is Harrison Ford’s movie better or worse because he’s dating Carlista Flockhart in his own time? If Brad Pitt had divorced Jennifer Aniston and started dating Tom Cruise instead, would his abilities as an actor get better or worse?

The answers to these questions, at least in my head, is no. My attitude is that as long as they keep making movies/music, I don’t give a sh*t what they do in their own time, while some have a tendency to judge an actor/musician by what they do outside their job. Because it is a job they’re doing, just like the rest of us. The biggest difference is that they have a slightly better income than the rest of us, but does that mean we have to know what they do under their duvet, in their own home, when they’re off work? Would it be equally interesting if there was a two page article about what Anna from London did with Andy from Cornwall over the weekend? Hardly.


Who Decides Who’s Hot And Who’s Not?

Don’t any public personalities have the right to a personal life? In that case, shouldn’t there be more articles about Bus driver Anderson, age 56, who drives bus 292 between Borehamwood and Edgware every day, who in his own time has sex with his wife twice a week, most likely between the news and the sports more often? He’s just as public as Robbie Williams, does a job like Robbie does and meet as many people – if not more – every day that appreciates what he does. But for some strange reason is Mr Williams more interesting than Mr Anderson. Why? The answer may be Because the press makes us interested in Robbie, not Anderson.


The New National Sport

Does it really matter that much what Elton does with his private parts, compared to what the receptionist at Shakespeare Hotel does with his? No, that’s right, we don’t want to know about a receptionist, cause we don’t know him. Do we know a celebrity after reading a couple of gossip-articles about them? We seem to like to think we do. What? She sleeps with him!? Well, that says everything about her, now, doesn’t it? and then we automatically know everything about her as a person, what she thinks and why she does what she does. When we know what happens in the bedroom, we know everything. Hooray for the new national sport.