CAST: Jared Hasselhoff
| NAME: | Jared Hasselhoff |
| AGE: | 300 |
| RACE: | Human (Vampire) |
| PROFESSION: | Opportunist / coward / bringer of Armageddon |
| WORLD OF ORIGIN: | Middle-earth, end of First Age, by way of present-day Earth |
| FIRST APPEARANCE: | The Great Hall - Part One |
Jared was stolen from his parents' home as a small child and was brought up in a hidden retreat by some of Sauron's vampires who survived the War of Wrath in the first age. These vampires were desperate to bolster their numbers, which explains why the infant Jared didn't end up as a snack between meals. His pale-skinned instructors tried for many years to train him to be their ultimate warrior; they taught him arts that should never have been discovered; they endeavoured to shape him in the image of Morgoth. However, Jared's undoubted skills in these fields were marred by two things: his desire to look 'cool' (and cool dudes don't act like they know stuff, man) and his total and utter cowardice.
When the vampires' lair was flushed out by a party of crusading High Elves from Lindon, in desperation they tried to give Jared the 'bite' before sending him out to fight off their attackers. Unfortunately, the vampire bestowing the 'bite' only had one incisor, and as he tried to make the second puncture an Elf ran him through. Jared's seemingly-lifeless form was revived by the spattered gore of his vampiric 'sire' and he fled. While his strength and stamina had been greatly enhanced, he was never killed by the 'bite' and so lacks the full range of a vampire's abilities. This has been both a blessing and a curse: he doesn't die in sunlight (although he has to cover up well), and he can still subsist on normal food and drink, but he is not as strong or invulnerable as a full-blooded vampire. He can shape-shift for limited periods, though, and he doesn't have to spend years in a coffin to recover his strength. Furthermore, crucifixes, stakes and garlic have no effect on him at all, and he has an interesting (if somewhat unpredictable) range of supernatural abilities.
He was once so frightened that he managed to run straight through the fabric of space and time, and ended up in Paris, where he lived a cool and bohemian life for several years before his neighbours gathered a lynch mob. They didn't actually know he was a vampire -- he just has that sort of effect on people. When the Rift opened up, he gladly ran into it, to find himself in the land of Hyeron. He doesn't really care where he is though...
just don't keep bugging him...
...okay???
After spending much of his life on present-day Earth trying to locate the power necessary for bringing about the end of the world and transforming himself into a god, Jared was pursued into an interdimensional rift in Paris by an angry mob. Inveigling himself into Rabbyt's confidence, he persuaded Lord Graham to give him the key to the library to carry out his investigations. His plan was interrupted by the activities of Lord Adam, whose simulacrum he first killed and then immobilised, and whom he eventually rendered harmless using impotence powder. He and Morwen, accompanied by Karlingalas, discovered a series of tunnels under the library, ostensibly leading to the 'Book Stack' but clearly much older than the castle itself. Jared located what he believed to be the information he needed, only to find that it was incomplete -- and revealing his plans in the process. He and Morwen discovered a mysterious shape-shifting entity which transported them and Karlingalas out of the library to work its will. However, this was not before it implanted a conscience in Jared's psyche, something that is causing him a great deal of distress. Jared and the other two made their way from the southern border of Hyeron to a small village, where Jared began to receive unsettling premonitions. Attempting to make their way back to the castle to sort things out with Rabbyt, they were intercepted by the Hyeronian Paganini, in hiding and planning to ambush the leader of the army threatening Hare from the west. Jared agreed to lure the enemy commander, Zorag the Barbarian, from his camp, and succeeded in bringing him back to the village, where in an epic battle he was killed by Paganini, with Jared's somewhat accidental assistance. Jared and the others, joined by Count Tildanor, a Balrog who has recently fallen through the Rift, continued their assault on the 'baddies' by attacking the late Zorag's camp. Jared and the Count tracked the vanished Morwen into the forest, and Jared expressed severe doubts as to the veracity of Morwen's story, which nearly led the three to come to blows. Fleeing from an unknown threat, the trio then encountered Lord Graham, who informed them that all was not well at Castle Hare. Jared and company later discovered this for themselves, but accepted the commission to rid the castle of the remaining rebels as a means of discovering more about the Castle, the nature of this world and how they all came to be there. Jared was typically disgusted that, on eventually finding the miscreants (Sir Confused-a-lot, Morgil and Rakeis), they teamed up with them instead of turning them in for a large reward, but went with the flow and followed the larger group down the abyss and into the group of Leila, Adam, The Wizard With No Name and Warren. When Karlingalas showed up again it seemed to be business as usual, but Jared has - to his disgust - found himself left behind with Leila, WWNN, Paganini and Morgil.
Jared wants you all to know how much he really, really, really hates hippies.
| FITNESS: | Good | FOCUS: | Average | PERSONALITY: | Poor |
| CO-ORDINATION: | Average | INTELLECT: | Average | APPEARANCE: | Good |
| QUICKNESS: | Good | WITS: | Superb |
| Combat (unarmed): | Good | Fast-talking: | Superb | |
| Intimidation: | Good | Mystic arts: | Good |